My brother and I recently visited a South American country.
My uncle has a house down there, so we could stay with him for free, making it
a pretty cheap and easy between-semesters vacation! Overall, it was an amazing
trip. Beautiful beaches, and acres and acres of open farmland and jungle.
Sweet, beautiful people. Delicious food!
But we did have a scare.
My uncle, brother and I decided to visit a particularly pristine
and stunning beach just before sunset. We rode in on quads, me on the back with
my brother driving, down some dirt roads, beautiful jungle trees on either side
of us, some houses here and there, cows, chickens. We finally reached the
beach, took a swim in the clear warm water, a walk among the tide pools, sat in
awe to watch the colorful sunset.
I felt so at peace as we loaded up right
after sunset to ride back. My uncle rode on a bit ahead of us, and I started
humming “There is no God like You” in the warm, lazy air, as my brother rolled
us along.
I still remember it with that dream-like feeling, but it was
real. Three men suddenly came out of the trees into the middle of the road in
front of the quad my brother and I were on. They were masked, and each holding
a machete. The guy in the middle pointed his machete straight out toward us, as
if holding a gun (I originally thought it was a gun).
It felt like the next ten seconds were more like ten
minutes. So much flashed before me. I’ve had two scary things happen to me in
my life and prayed in those moments, but I didn’t even pray in this minute. I
do remember I screamed, the type you probably never want to hear. I think I
thought we were going to die.
I didn’t know what would happen, but of all the things that
could go through my imagination, I certainly never expected what did happen. My
brother, suddenly, yelled out, as if charging with a football, or riding a
horse into battle, and gunned the quad hard straight toward the men. I think it
surprised them as much as it did me, and they jumped out of the way for a
second, then my brother sped even faster down the road. He said one of the guys
chased us for a second, but stopped as we rounded the road. I think I was still
in shock to really notice anything.
We were fine. Nothing other than that happened. God
protected us, and gave my brother such a great presence of mind. Later, as I
kept telling him how proud I was of his courage, he said it was just protective
instinct—he didn’t really think about it. What a great brother!! How amazing
God makes men! . . . I certainly would have frozen up!
But I was scared. Still scared.
Just knowing we were accosted, seeing big knives pointed at
me. But although the weapons certainly held the power, for some reason, it
seemed the worst part of the bandits were the masks and what they represented—the
unknown. Take my money and camera? Fine. But what else? The not knowing was the
most scary.
A friend of mine gave me the book “Spiritual Warfare” the
day before I left on the trip, and as I tucked it in my bag, I wondered what
God had for me those next two weeks. My Bible study on Luke (I also brought
with me) was on the same topic. And truly, there were some themes of spiritual
warfare on that trip! But praise God for teaching things in His perfect timing.
Spiritual warfare, I’ve found, is full of masks, full of the
unknown.
Sometimes the most attractive is actually evil, and other
times the most ugly-looking may be righteous. Jesus Himself was not beautiful
in His earthly body, though He IS so beautiful!!
There were two other masks on this trip.
One was a mask over the idea of the “life force.” My brother
and I got closely connected with a community that believed strongly in a type
of “energy” and “life force.” Though I love the people, unfortunately the
spirits behind these sources of energy were demonic.
C.S. Lewis describes these people as “the man, not using,
but veritably worshipping, what he vaguely calls “Forces’ while denying the
existence of ‘spirits’” (Screwtape Letters).
This was exactly what was happening, and the deception was
strong. Those who came under this life force even expressed a need to educate
people of their ideology. I kept my mouth shut for the sake of “peace,” but my
soul cried out that there was a strong mask pulled over the eyes of those
influenced by this “force.”
The second mask was my own flesh turning against me. I love
to meet new people, and easily get into conversations with locals and other
travelers . . . had sooo much fun walking around trying to learn Spanish with
the sweet locals of the town!!
However, I met a guy around my age from a European country,
and after an engaging two-hour conversation, I felt myself wanting to talk with
him more. He was expressing how he was uncomfortable with evangelists who come up
to him to preach the Gospel. He especially wondered at their motives, and if
there was an agenda. He backed off a little when he found out I was a
Christian, though I tried to validate his feelings of being put on the defense
with people he didn’t even know. I told him I wasn’t offended by what he said
and then asked if I could push back a little in a theoretical question. He said
he felt comfortable in our conversation and, “Of course.” When I asked if they
really believed what they were saying, would they want to tell other people
about it, he said it was a good question and he’d have to think about it.
That sent me flying. Maybe he’ll become a Christian! Maybe
he’s the . . . stop.
I already know that the first and greatest thing I am
looking for in a future husband is his love for God. If after that, there’s
attraction and common interests and pursuing on his part, then great, move
forward. But certainly, not the other way around. Otherwise, my liking is only
of the flesh. And so I knew . . . if this guy doesn’t even love God at all, this
liking was of the flesh.
This happened once before, about five years ago, in
Thailand. I liked a guy who wasn’t a Christian. It came right at the same week
I decided to go full fledge in my pursuit of God and His Word. Coincidence,
maybe. But I lean more toward it being spiritual warfare.
I’ve waited my whole life for a man who loves God, and that’s
what I’m strongly attracted to. And then, out of nowhere . . . someone who doesn’t even like God? Hmm . . .
No, I think it is another mask. I do certainly pray for this
European man that his own masks will come down and he will find the Lord Jesus
Christ. But God made it clear that he is not for me, and that my desire for whatever
he may have is a mask Satan is dangling before me. Now, I am amazed at the
attraction. It was a mirage my own mind created, perhaps with some help. Not
reality.
It is embarrassing to tell this story. But I am human . . .
and not beyond deception! But praise God for His Holy Spirit to help me fight
these battles for truth!
So . . .
As I look back at the trip, I know that He ordained every
single event, every moment. I learned a lot. And had so many sweet moments with
Him. He protected me. Taught me. And truly when He says my battle is against
the world, the flesh, and the devil, I see it!
As I came back, I realized how much I pray for security. In
fact, almost all of last year, I asked God to take away my insecurities, my
greatest battle.
But I wonder if, sometimes, God may ask me to pray for the
opposite . . . to take away my
securities. For I don’t trust in safe America, in my job, in a reputation or
abilities, or even in courageous people or my own mind . . . I trust in the
Lord Jesus Christ alone.
He, alone, is my security.
And that scares me sometimes.
The day after our attack, I went to my alone time. I sat
there for a moment. And then I whispered, “Who are You God? . . . You scare me.”
It wasn’t even the men with the masks who scared me as much as my God, my
personal friend I was laughing with yesterday, who allowed that to happen. He
protected us, but doesn’t always protect everyone.
And I started to think of the destitution, poverty, diseases,
abuse, rape, brutality, death, around the world . . . around 50% of the world .
. . 50%! And the concept of my good God, powerful strong God, and an evil
world, shook me in my quiet time that morning.
“God?”
But as I processed throughout the next week (telling EVERY
PERSON we met our story, hehe!!), He was so sweet. He answered.
In my study on Luke, Beth Moore states, “Satan doesn’t have
to get us thinking blatantly satanic thoughts to have victory over us. All he
needs is to get us looking at life from man’s perspective rather than God’s. If
we surrender our minds to the things of God, we are safe!”
But she doesn’t conclude that that safety means life,
comforts, and prosperity, for that is not His way. In fact the disciples had to
learn, “had Jesus saved His disciples the anxiety of His betrayal, His capture,
His trials, and His death, He wouldn’t have saved them at all. Without the
cross, man had no chance!” (Beth Moore).
And I am called to pick up my cross and follow Him.
Certainly, there is joy, and I continue to pray for safety.
And I am soooo thankful He protected us from those men in the jungle! And for
such a courageous brother!!
But perhaps the greatest threat, the greatest enemy, the
greatest mask, that God saw in my life as He intimately engaged with me, was
that I need to see there is no security in this world. Going back to America
wasn’t going to preserve me anymore than encountering any foe here on earth.
My security is already sure in Him. And it is only in Him.
And sometimes that is hard. But Lord Jesus I ask that You help me to see, and
believe, this truth.
And to walk in JOY in this GREAT GREAT victory!!
